Dr Wingnut

Month: August 2000

  • For the computer lover in all of us.

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    Dr Wingnut
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    At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: “If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000 miles to the gallon.”In response to Bill’s comments, GM issued a press release…

  • FOR SALE BY OWNER:

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica.  Excellent Condition. $1200 or best offer.  No longer needed.  Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything

  • Football

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    The National Football League recently announced a new era.  From now on, no offensive team names will be permitted. While the owners of the team rush to change uniforms and such, the National Football League announced, yesterday, its name changes and schedules for the '99 season:The Washington Native Americans will host the New York Very…

  • Florida to Boston

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    A husband and wife are traveling by car from Key West to Boston.  After almost 24 hours on the road, they're too tired to continue, and they decide to stop for a rest.  They stop at a nice hotel and take a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get…

  • Fire rescue stories

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    The RescueA ladder was placed against the bedroom window of a burning house, and a young fireman rushed up. Inside was a curvy brunette in a see-through nightie. "Aha," said he, "You're the second pregnant girl I've rescued this year!""But I'm not pregnant," indignantly exclaimed the brunette."You're not rescued yet either."Fire At The Blonde's HouseThis blonde's house…

  • FEELING OLD?

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    This September, 1998, a whole new batch of freshmen will walk onto college campuses in all parts of the country.   Did you know…Most were born in 1980.They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan era, and did not know he had ever been shot.They were prepubescent when the Persian Gulf War was waged.Black Monday…

  • EXPERTS WARN OF THREAT FROM 100GigaBurg BUG

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    Experts warned today of a new and deadly threat to our beleaguered civilization: the 100GB Bug.As most people know, McDonald's restaurant signs show the number of hamburgers the giant chain has sold. That number now stands at 99 billion burgers, or 99 Gigaburgers (GB). Within months or even weeks, that number will roll over to…