Year: 2001

So God asked him, "What is wrong with you?" Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to. God said, "He was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman."He said, "This person will gather food for you, cook for you, and when you discover clothing she'll wash it for…

Atlanta, Ga.Scientists at the Centers for Disease Control and Symantec's AntiVirus Research Center today confirmed that "foot-and-mouth" disease cannot be spread by Microsoft's Outlook email application, believed to be the first time the program has ever failed to propagate a major virus."Frankly, we've never heard of a virus that couldn't spread through Microsoft Outlook, so…

An unemployed man goes to try for a job with Microsoft as a cleaner. The manager there arranges for an aptitude test. After the test, the manager says: You will be appointed on the scale of $30 per day. Let me have your e-mail address, so that I can send you a form to complete…

Bosses of a publishing firm are trying to determine why no one noticed that one of their employees had been sitting dead at his desk for FIVE DAYS before anyone asked if he was feeling okay.George Turklebaum, 51, who had been employed as a proof-reader at a New York firm for 30 years, had a…

My sister sent this to me today and I thought you might enjoy the wish. Normally I dislike "send this to everyone you know or the heavens will fall" messages, but this is pretty benign. Here 'tis:AN IRISH FRIENDSHIP BRACELET:You had better send this back! Good Luck! I hope it works…May there always be work…

Everything I need to know, I learned from Noah’s Ark:Don’t miss the boat!Remember that we are all in the same boat.Plan ahead.  It wasn’t raining when Noah built the Ark.Stay fit.  When you’re 600 years old, someone may ask you to do something really big.Don’t listen to critics; just get on with the job that…

Two bumper stickers I particularly liked, the first of which I saw in Tucson, and the second of which was sent to me by e-mail:The one from Tucson:These aren't the Droids you're looking for…Bumper Sticker Seen in Palm Beach, FL…HONK IF YOU VOTED FOR GORE…IT'S THE BIG BUTTON IN THE MIDDLE OF YOUR STEERING WHEELAlthough…