Year: 2007
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April Fools
Not only is it Mrs. Wingnut’s birthday today, Google got into the spirit by adding this to the Gmail signon screen:They also posted this additional information.
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Forecasts
An economic forecaster is like a cross-eyed javelin thrower: They don’t win many accuracy contests, but they keep the crowd’s attention.Anonymous
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Traveling
How to Get Back at Someone Who Pisses You Off While Traveling…If you are sitting next to someone who irritates you on a plane or train, follow these instructions:Quietly and calmly open up your laptop case.Remove your laptop.Start up.Make sure the guy who is annoying you can see the screen.Close your eyes and tilt your…
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God is a little like…
General Electric. He lights your path.Bayer Aspirin. He works wonders.Hallmark Cards. He cared enough to send the very best.Tide. He gets out the stains that others leave behind.VO-5 Hair Spray. He holds through all kinds of weather.Dial Soap. Aren’t you glad you know Him? Don’t you wish everyone did?Sears. He has everything.Alka Seltzer. Oh, what…
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Faults
Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.Mark Twain