Category: Humor

Dallas ATC: “Tower to Saudi Air 911 — You are cleared to land eastbound on runway 9R.”Saudi Air: “Thank you Dallas ATC.  Acknowledge cleared to land on infidel’s runway 9R — Allah be Praised!”Dallas ATC: “Tower to Iran Air 711 — You are cleared to land westbound on runway 9R.”Iran Air: “Thank you Dallas ATC. …

You are riding on a beautiful white horse.  On your left side is a drop off.  On your right side are several ostriches being chased by a lion.  In front of you are four large gazelles which won’t get out of your way and you can’t seem to overtake them.  Behind you is a stampede…

I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer.Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in.Aren’t you the guy from the Village People?Hey, you must’ve been doin’ about 125 mph to keep up with me.  Good job!Are You Andy or Barney?I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition…

via email from Jill Lord, Fri, 7 Mar 2008 05:43:41 -0800

Why you need a friend when you go drinking P.S. A Good Friend!!!! (without a camera)via email from Bob Rosen, Wed, 5 Mar 2008 08:17:02 -0800

OK, let’s go over this once again…Seems some of you land-locked people are having trouble discerning what the differences are between Dolphins & Whales.  Ya’ll need to go back to Aquatic Biology 101 and take ol’ lady Snodgrass’s class again.ORYou can opt out and take my abridged version of the class.Good!I figured you would opt…

What gets longer when pulled, fits between your boobs, inserts neatly in a hole and works best when jerked?  A seatbelt you pervert!  Buckle up!via email from Bob Rosen, Wed, 5 Mar 2008 08:09:14 -0800