Category: Quotations

Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?  I’m halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God…. I could be eating a slow learner.Lynda Montgomery

People seldom see the halting and painful steps by which the most insignificant success is achieved.Anne Sullivan Macy

A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men.  I just want to say to the authors of that study: “Duh.”Conan O’Brien

If you have great talents, industry will improve them; if you have but moderate abilities, industry will supply their deficiency.Sir Joshua Reynolds

My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat.  I said, “Mom, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim.”Paula Poundstone

Work as though you would live forever, and live as though you would die today.Og Mandino

Relationships are hard.  It’s like a full time job, and we should treat it like one.  If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks’ notice.  There should be severance pay, the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp.Bob Ettinger