Author: Dr Wingnut
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Temperature Guide
TemperatureWhat others doWhat Minnesotans do+60New Yorkers try to turn on the heat.Minnesotans plant gardens.+50Californians shiver uncontrollably.Minnesotans sunbathe.+40Italian cars won’t start.Minnesotans drive with the windows down.+32Distilled water freezes.Minnehaha Creek water gets thicker.+20Floridians wear coats, gloves & wool hats.Minnesotans throw on a t-shirt.+15Californians begin to evacuate the state.Minnesotans go swimming.ZeroNew York landlords finally turn up the heatMinnesotans…
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Bravado
We must not always judge of the generality of the opinion by the noise of the acclamation.Edmund Burke
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Talk about spoiled
With a $225 million paycheck, a gal gets used to a little special treatment. So when OPRAH WINFREY was denied entry to the Hermés store in Paris 15 minutes after closing time, the daytime queen got peeved. The ultra-luxury retailer later apologized for snubbing “Mme. Oprah,” saying the store was setting up a “private public…
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Duty
Do something every day that you don’t want to do; this is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty.Mark Twain
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Memory Bank
A 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud man, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o’clock, with his hair fashionably coifed and shaved perfectly applied, even though he is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today.His wife of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary. After many hours of waiting patiently in…