Dr Wingnut

Category: Hallothanksholinewyear

  • Holiday gifts…

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    Dr Wingnut
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    That are better than "Stuff"Twelve Pictures in my Mind that make me happy.Seeing the wonder, warmth and hope of a sunrise.Appreciating the healty glow of a peaceful sunset.Someone speacial to sit with me when I am old.Hearing my spouse sleep softly and quietly when I head off to work.Viewing and contemplating the wonders of a…

  • Coping with the Holiday Season

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    Dr Wingnut
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    A Time of Stress… or a Time of Peace?You get to choose!Twelve ideas for coping with stress and staying sober:Be grateful for what you have.  Life is not perfect.  Lower your expectations.Most of us don't need more "stuff" but most of us could use more serenity.Make a holiday budget and stick to it.  Keeping the…

  • A Holiday Wish

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    Dr Wingnut
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    He laid her on the tableSo white clean and bare.His forehead wet with beads of sweatHe rubbed her here and there.He touched her neck, then her breastAnd then drooling, felt her thigh.The slit was wet and all was set,He gave a joyous cry.The hole was wide…he looked insideAll was dark and murky.He rubbed his hands…

  • Christmas Needy

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Dear Friend:With the Christmas season approaching, please look into your heart to help those in need. Hundreds of National Basketball Association basketball players in our very own country are living at or just below the seven-figure salary level (Atrocious!)And, as if that weren't bad enough, they will be deprived of pay for several weeks—possibly a…

  • Martha Stewart's December Calendar

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Blanch carcass from Thanksgiving turkey.  Spray paint gold, turn upside down and use as a sleigh to hold Christmas cards.Have Mormon Tabernacle Choir record outgoing Christmas message for answering machine.Using candlewick and hand gilded miniature pine cones, fashion cat-o-nine tails.  Flog Gardener.Repaint Sistine Chapel ceiling in ecru, with mocha trim.Get new eyeglasses.  Grind lenses myself.Fax…

  • The Rude Train Conductor

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    Dr Wingnut
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    A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her son playing with his new electric train in the living room.She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now, 'cause this is the last stop! And…

  • Just in Today

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Continuing the current trend of large-scale mergers and acquisitions, it was announced today at a press conference that Christmas and Hanukkah will merge. An industry source said that the deal had been in the works for about 1300 years.While details were not available at press time, it is believed that the overhead cost of having…