Category: Humor

The Forest Service has issued a BEAR WARNING in the national forests for this summer.  They’re urging everyone to protect themselves by wearing bells and carrying pepper spray.Campers should be alert for signs of fresh bear activity, and they should be able to tell the difference between Black Bear dung and Grizzly Bear dung.Black Bear…

Pick the one that fits you best for today’s mood, and wear it proudly.via email from Duane McDowell, Tue, 3 Oct 2006 11:09:35 -0700

A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.A snail can sleep for three years.All polar bears are left handed.American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first-class.Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.Babies are born without knee caps.  They…

If you love something, set it free…If it comes back, it will always be yours…If it doesn’t come back, it was never yours to begin with.  But, if it just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses your telephone, takes your money, and doesn’t appear to realize that you…

One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house.  His three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard.  The door of his wife’s car was open, as was the front door to the…

An insurance man visited me at home to talk about our mortgage insurance.  He was throwing a lot of facts and figures at me, and I wanted to follow as best I could, so I told my 6-year-old son to run and get me a pad.  He came back and handed me a Kotex right…

A young family moved into a house next door to a vacant lot.One day a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot.The young family’s 6-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and started talking with the workers.  She hung around and eventually…