Category: Humor
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Internet Recovery Program
I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Internet. I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing. I will get dressed before noon. I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan…
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Bi-Partisan Bumpersticker
At last…. A bumper sticker for both parties. Finally someone has come out with a 100% Bi-Partisan Political bumper sticker. The hottest selling bumper sticker comes from New York State:“2008 – RUN HILLARY RUN”Democrats put it on the rear bumper. Republicans put it on the front bumper.via email from John Treworgy, Wed, 5 Oct 2005…
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Bar
Four retired guys, two from California and two from Arizona, are walking down a street in Phoenix. Then they turn a corner and see a sign that says, “Old Timer’s Bar”“ALL DRINKS 10 CENTS!”They look at each other, and then go in.The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room, “Come on…
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Fall classes for men
AT THE LEARNING CENTER FOR ADULTSREGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY- September 31stNOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.Class 1How To Fill Up The Ice Cube TraysStep by Step, with Slide Presentation.Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00…
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Good marital relations
Dear Husband:I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell.Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was…
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Governmentium
A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named “Governmentium.” It has one neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.These 312 particles are held together by binding particles called…
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Solutions through gunplay
In the Northwest Georgia Mountains you don’t see too many people hang-gliding. So, Bubba decided to save up and get a hang-glider. He takes it to the highest mountain, and after struggling to the top, he gets ready to take flight. He takes off running and reaches the edge—into the wind he goes!Meanwhile, Maw and…
