Category: Humor

This new product will reduce your communications needs considerably.  Its intuitive interactions will often leave you scratching your head in wonder.    When you pause in your communication and appear to be searching for words, the FeMail will quickly determine the direction and content of the communication and will finish the document for you.From your…

He said, "I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library." I thought, "That's a turn-up for the books."And the back of his anorak was leaping up and down, and people were chucking money to him.  I said, "Do you earn a living doing that?"…

Here is one for anybody who has done tech supportA man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost.  He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts: "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"The man below says "Yes, you're in a…

Boss: "You submitted the lowest bid to run our new technical support hotline, Mister Dogbert.  The other bidders would love to know how you plan to handle twelve thousand calls a day by yourself."Dogbert: "Tell them to call me."Scott AdamsNETWORK CONFUSIONMy husband works for a company which provides on-line services.  A caller to the tech…

All babies start out with the same number of raw cells which, over nine months, develop into a complete female baby.Sometimes a problem occurs when cells are instructed by the little chromosomes to make a male baby instead.  Because there are only so many cells to go around, the cells necessary to develop a male's…

486The average IQ needed to understand a PC.State-of-the-artAny computer you can't afford.ObsoleteAny computer you own.MicrosecondThe time it takes for your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete.G3Apple's new Macs that make you say "Gee, three times faster than the computer I bought for the same price a Microsecond ago."Syntax ErrorWalking into a computer store and saying "Hi,…

WHAT IS THE PROPER AGE TO GET MARRIED?"Once I'm done with kindergarten, I'm going to find me a wife."Tom, 5WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?"On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date."Mike, 9WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS…