Heard from kids at Sunday School:

  1. The first book of the Bible is Guiness, in which Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree.
  2. Noah's wife was called Joan of Ark.
  3. Lot's wife was a pillar of salt by day and ball of fire by night.
  4. The Jews had trouble throughout their history with unsympathetic Genitals.
  5. Samson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the apostles.
  6. Unleavened bread is bread made without any ingredients.
  7. Moses went to the top of Mt. Cyanide to get the ten commandments.
  8. The seventh commandment is "thou shalt not admit adultery".
  9. Joshua led the Hebrews in the battle of Geritol.
  10. David fought with the Finkelsteins, a fierce race of people who lived in biblical times.
  11. Solomon had 300 wives and 700 Porcupines.
  12. Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.
  13. Jesus was followed by the 12 Decibels.
  14. The Epistles were the wives of the Apostles.
  15. Matthew was one of the Opossums.
  16. Paul preached holy acrimony, which is another name for marriage.
  17. A Christian should only have one wife. This is called monotony.