I went to the doctor for my yearly physical.  She starts with certain basics.

“How much do you weigh?” she asks.

“115,” I say.

The nurse puts me on the scale.  It turns out my weight is 140.

“Your height?”

“5 foot 8,” I say.

The nurse checks and sees that I only measure 5′ 5″.

She then takes my blood pressure and tells me it is very high.

“Of course it’s high!”  I scream, “When I came in here I was tall and slender!  Now I’m short and fat!”

She put me on Prozac.

via email from Jill Lord, Wed, 15 Feb 2006 17:01:24 -0800