Why did the chicken cross the road?

Pat Buchanan
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American
Dr. Seuss
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told!
Ernest Hemingway
To die. In the rain.
Jerry Falwell
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's what "they" call it: the "other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that.
Martin Luther King, Jr.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross the road without having their motives called into question.
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was enough for us.
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
Karl Marx
It was a historical inevitability.
Saddam Hussein
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
Ronald Reagan
What chicken?
Captain James T. Kirk
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Fox Mulder
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many chickens have to cross before you believe it?
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
Bill Gates
I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook, and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?
Bill Clinton
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken please?
The Bible
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, thou shalt cross the road. And the chicken crossed the road and there was much rejoicing.
Colonel Sanders
I missed one?
George W. Bush
I don't think I should have to answer that question. I haven't got the foggiest idea. It's irrelegunt anyway.
Louis Farrakhan
The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.
via eMail, Wed, 12 Apr 2000 07:02:33 -0600