You Know you are from Nebraska if…

  1. During a storm, you check the cattle before the kids.
  2. You are related to more than half the town.
  3. Your quarterback is hurt and you are hoping it is the first thing on the six o'clock news, and it is.
  4. You use your life savings to go to the Nebraska-Colorado game.
  5. You can wear red and white overalls in public and not feel stupid.
  6. There's a tornado warning and the whole town is outside watching for the tornado.
  7. You think Abraham Lincoln was named for the capital of Nebraska.
  8. You know the Woodmen Tower is not made of wood.
  9. You don't buy all of your vegetables at the grocery store.
  10. You go to the State Fair for your ONLY vacation.
  11. You are on a first name basis with the county sheriff.
  12. When little smokies are something you serve only for special occasions.
  13. You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.
  14. You have the number to the Co-op feed store on speed dial.
  15. You know what the "sea of red & white" is.
  16. You think that using the elevator involves a corn truck.
  17. Your mayor is also the doctor, barber, and/or dentist.
  18. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.
  19. You are walking knee deep in snow.
  20. You call the wrong number by mistake and talk to the person for an hour anyway.
  21. You know cow pies are not made of beef.
  22. Your excuse for getting out of school is that the cows got out.
  23. Your early Morning Prayer covers rain, cattle, and Frank Solich.
  24. You consider a romantic evening to include driving through McDonald's and renting a hunting instruction video.
  25. You want to buy manure.
  26. You listen to "Paul Harvey" every day at noon.
  27. Your nearest neighbor is in the next area code.
  28. You know the difference between field corn and sweet corn, when they are still on the stalk.
  29. You pick up all the free stuff at the State Fair.
  30. Football schedules are checked before wedding dates are set.
  31. You can eat an ear of corn with no utensils in less than 20 seconds.
  32. You wear your irrigation boots to church.
  33. You know enough to get your driving done early on Sundays (before the Sunday drivers come out.)
  34. It takes 3 minutes to reach your destination and it's clear across town.
  35. You can tell the smell of a skunk and the smell of a feedlot apart.
  36. True love means you'll ride on a tractor with him.
  37. You consider a building to be a "mall" if it's bigger than the local Alco.
  38. You call lunch "dinner" and dinner "supper."
  39. You complain about interstate construction.
  40. You think it's normal to get a side of spaghetti at a steakhouse.
  41. You avoid Omaha because you're afraid of getting mugged.
via eMail, Mon, 31 Jan 2000 20:00:53 -0600