Dr Wingnut

Author: Dr Wingnut

  • Talent

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    Dr Wingnut
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    If you have great talents, industry will improve them; if you have but moderate abilities, industry will supply their deficiency.Sir Joshua Reynolds

  • Learning to swim

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    My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat.  I said, “Mom, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim.”Paula Poundstone

  • Letters to Santa

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Deer santa:I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas.  Iv ben a gud boy all yeer.Yer Frend,BiLLyDear Billy,Nice spelling.  You’re on your way to a career in lawn care.  How about I send you a f gging book so you can learn to read and write?  I’m giving your older brother the space…

  • Bring chips

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    A little boy wanted to meet God.  He knew it was a long trip to where God lived, so he packed his suitcase with a bag of potato chips and a six-pack of root beer and started his journey.When he had gone about three blocks, he met an old woman.  She was sitting in the…

  • Today

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Work as though you would live forever, and live as though you would die today.Og Mandino

  • Irene Lord’s Candied Fruit Cakes

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    Dr Wingnut
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    This is my paternal grandmother’s fruit cake recipe.  In contract with other fruit cakes which so many deign to be doorstops, this recipe is in a class by itself since it has none of the nasty doorstop fruitcake items like citron, citrus peels and the like.  The doctor always makes 3 or 4 batches to…

  • Relationships

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    Relationships are hard.  It’s like a full time job, and we should treat it like one.  If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks’ notice.  There should be severance pay, the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp.Bob Ettinger