Category: Humor

Wanda’s dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman.  Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, “I’ll leave the key under the mat.  Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I’ll mail you a check.”“Oh, by the way don’t worry about my bulldog.  He won’t…

The National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had covertly funded a project with the U.S. auto makers for the past 5 years, whereby the auto makers were installing black box voice recorders in four-wheel drive pickup trucks and SUV’s in an effort to determine in fatal accidents, the circumstances in the last 15 seconds…

You’ve had arguments over the comparative quality of Fried Dough.You call four inches of snow “a dusting.”You don’t understand why there aren’t fried clam shacks elsewhere in the county.You know what an Irving is and the location of 15 of them.You knew all the flavors at Perry’s Nut House.Your car is covered in yellow-green dust…

Campbell’s has announced it soon will stock America’s grocery store shelves with “Bush Soup,” in honor of our President.  A company Spokesman said the soup will consist primarily of a weenie in hot water.via email from Duane McDowell, Tue, 3 Jan 2006 09:09:13 -0800

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married.  The ceremony wasn’t much but the reception was excellent.A dyslexic man walks into a bra…“Doc, I can’t stop singing ‘The Green, Green Grass of Home.”“That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.”“Is it common?”“Well, It’s Not Unusual.”An invisible man marries an invisible woman.  The kids…

A guy is driving around and he sees a sign in front of a house: “Talking Dog For Sale.”He rings the bell, and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard.  The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador Retriever sitting there.“You talk?” he asks.“Yep,” the Lab replies.“So, what’s your story?”The…

Don’t worry if your job is small,and your rewards are few.Remember that the mighty oak,Was once a nut like you.Anonymous