Category: Humor

This is a true story of something that happened just a few years ago at USC. There was a professor who was a deeply committed atheist. His primary goal for one required class was to spend the entire semester attempting to prove that God couldn't exist.His students were always afraid to argue with him because…

Eleven people were clinging precariously to a wildly swinging rope suspended from a crumbling outcropping on Mount Everest.  Ten were blonde, one was a brunette.As a group they decided that one of the party should let go.  If that didn't happen the rope would break and everyone would perish.  For an agonizing few moments no…

If you think life is bad… How would you like to be an egg?You only get laid once.You only get eaten once.It takes 4 minutes to get hard.Only 2 minutes to get soft.You share your box with 11 other guys.But worst of all, the only chick that ever saton your face was your mother.So cheer…

Submitted by iVillager S. Joan H.Helium was up, feathers were down.Paper was stationary.Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.Knives were up sharply.Cows steered into a bull market.Pencils lost a few points.Hiking equipment was trailing.Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline.Weights were up in heavy trading.Light switches were off.Mining equipment hit rock bottom.Diapers remained unchanged.Shipping…

One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts.  He'd toss them in the air, then catch them in his mouth.  In the middle of catching one, his wife asked a question, and as he turned to answer her, a peanut fell in his ear.  He tried and tried to dig it…

"I got married," said the first tavern regular, "so that I could get laid three or four times a week.""That's funny," said another patron, "That's why I got divorced."