Dr Wingnut

Category: Humor

  • New (sensitive) error codes

    —

    by

    Dr Wingnut
    in

    Sony has announced its own computer operating system now available on its hot new portable PC called the Vaio. Instead of producing the cryptic error messages characteristic of Microsoft's Windows 95, 3.1, and DOS operating systems, Sony's chairman Asai Tawara said, "We intend to capture the high ground by putting a human, Japanese face on…

  • One liners…

    —

    by

    Dr Wingnut
    in

    Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist?  He sold his soul to Santa.Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash?  He's all right now.Did you hear about the man who was tap dancing?  He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.How do crazy people…

  • PROGRAMMERS DRINKING SONG:

    —

    by

    Dr Wingnut
    in

    99 little bugs in the code,99 bugs in the code,Fix one bug, compile it again,101 little bugs in the code.101 little bugs in the code…Fix one bug, compile it again,102 little bugs in the code.102 little bugs in the code…(Repeat until BUGS = 0)

  • ROAST GHOST

    —

    by

    Dr Wingnut
    in

    KAY MARTIN, a secretary to a New Zealand MP, got the fright of her life a few weeks ago. According to the Auckland Sunday Star, she and a friend were chatting over a drink when they heard a chicken squawking. The bird sounded in some distress, so they went outside to investigate, thinking perhaps that…

  • Spielberg and Clinton To Collaborate

    —

    by

    Dr Wingnut
    in

    During his stay in the Hamptons, President Clinton was invited to stay at the Georgica Pond Estate of Steven Spielberg.  It has been learned from inside sources close to the president, that after all of the parties were over, Bill and Steve retired to the library and discussed some possible remakes of films to reflect…

  • Technical support tips

    —

    by

    Dr Wingnut
    in ,

    In the interests of providing a better service, your friendly Tech Support department has the following tips:When your computer crashes or something doesn't work, don't write anything down. We can play back the error messages from here.When a tech says he's coming right over, go for coffee. It's nothing to us to remember 481 screen…

  • THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN & WOMEN . . .

    —

    by

    Dr Wingnut
    in

    NICKNAMES:If Emma, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle go out for lunch, they will call each other Emma, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle.  But if Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack go out for a pint, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Useless.EATING OUT:When the bill arrives, Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack…