Category: Humor

Buzz was all excited about his new rifle.  So, he goes bear hunting in Alaska.  The first bear he sees is a little brown bear, and he kills it with his first shot.  There is a tap on his shoulder, and he turns around to see a big black bear.The black bear says "You've got…

Sheep don't have a gag reflex, or upper teethYou can get a better grip on a sheep's earSheep don't shy away from boots and leatherCotton mouth is easier to get rid of than a social diseaseNuttin' beats muttonSheep won't argue about whose turn it is to go get a towelSheep won't drink your liquor, smoke…

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt.""Stewardesses" is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand.A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.A dragonfly has a lifespan of 24 hours.A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.A shark is…

You know you are in ARIZONA when:You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.You can say 110 degrees without fainting.You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off.You can make instant sun tea.You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a bit chilly.You…

It was another Payday and I was tired of Mr. Goodbar.  I saw Miss Hershey standing behind the Powerhouse on the corner of Clark and Fifth Avenue when I whipped out my Whopper and whispered, "Hey Sweetheart, how'd you like to Crunch on my big hunk for a Million Dollar Bar?"Well, she immediately went down…

The photographer for a national magazine was assigned to get photos of a great forest fire. Smoke at the scene was too thick to get any good shots, so he frantically called his home office to hire a plane."It will be waiting for you at the airport!" he was assured by his editor.As soon as…

If Fed Ex and UPS* were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?I believe five out of four people have trouble with fractions.If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses…