Category: Humor
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State Mottos
Alabama: At Least We're not MississippiAlaska: 11,623 Eskimos Can't be Wrong!Arizona: But It's a Dry HeatArizona: Dehyd-rific!Arkansas: Litterasy Ain't EverthangArkansas: Litterasy Ain't EverthinCalifornia: As Seen on TVColorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't BotherConnecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and With Less CharacterDelaware: We Really Do Like the Chemicals in our WaterDelaware: Wow… you're in DelawareFlorida: Ask…
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Testing Her Hearing
A man goes to the doctor and complains that his wife can't hear him."How bad is it?" the doctor asks."I have no idea," says the husband."Well, please test her. Stand 20 feet away from her and say something. If she doesn't hear you, get closer and say the same thing. Keep moving closer and repeating…
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THE GREAT GAS OUT
It's time we did something about the price of gasoline in America! We are all sick and tired of high prices when there are literally millions of gallons in storage. Know what I found out? If there was just ONE day when no one purchased any gasoline, prices would drop drastically.The so-called oil cartel has…
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Toilet Paper
A husband, tired of his wife asking him how she looks, buys her a full length mirror. This does little to help, as now she just stands in front of the mirror, looking at herself, asking him how she looks.One day, fresh out of the shower, she is yet again in front of the mirror,…
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Welcome to Atlantic City
A TRUE STORY IN ATLANTIC CITY NJ (WAS IN THE PAPER)On a recent weekend in Atlantic City, a woman won a bucketful of quarters at a slot machine. She took a break from the slots for dinner with her husband in the hotel dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters in her…
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Why Lutherans Love to Sing…
By Garrison KeillorI have made fun of Lutherans for years — who wouldn't if you lived in Minnesota? But I have also sung with Lutherans and that is one of the main joys of life, along with hot baths and fresh sweet corn. We make fun of Lutherans for their blandness, their excessive calm, their…