Zen sarcasm

  • No one is listening until you fart.
  • Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day  Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
  • Don’t worry; it only seems kinky the first time.
  • We are born naked, wet and hungry and get slapped on our butt.  Then things get worse.
  • Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
  • There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday…around age eleven.
  • Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
These items are unique ones not contained in the list: Words to guide our lives.  This new list via email from Duane McDowell, Mon, 12 Sep 2005 12:17:25 -0500