Dr Wingnut

Category: Humor

  • Scandalous

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    Dr Wingnut
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    This is probably the reason behind the Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky’s scandel.via email from Bob Rosen, Tue, 7 Dec 2004 08:55:58 -0600

  • Bush can’t sleep

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    Dr Wingnut
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    One night, George W. Bush is tossing restlessly in his White House bed.  He awakens to see George Washington standing by him.Bush asks him,”George, what’s the best thing I can do to help the country?”“Set an honest and honorable example, just as I did,” Washington advises, then fades away.The next night, Bush is astir again…

  • Why women live longer than men

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Sixth placeFifth placeFourth placeThird placeSecond placeAnd the winner is:…and now a close runner upvia email from Jay Lord, Mon, 13 Dec 2004 16:51:03 +0000

  • Ode to New England

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    Dr Wingnut
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    It’s winter in New EnglandAnd the gentle breezes blow,70 miles per hour at 52 below!Oh, how I love New EnglandWhen the snow’s up to your butt.You take a breath of winter airAnd your nose, it freezes shut.Yes, the weather here is wonderful,So I guess I’ll hang around.But I could never leave New England‘Cause I’m frozen…

  • Letters to Santa

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Deer santa:I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas.  Iv ben a gud boy all yeer.Yer Frend,BiLLyDear Billy,Nice spelling.  You’re on your way to a career in lawn care.  How about I send you a f gging book so you can learn to read and write?  I’m giving your older brother the space…

  • 250 (More) Ways to Annoy Your Roommate

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Make brown-bag lunches for your roommate every morning.  Give them to him/her before s/he goes to class. Every time you enter the room, sit in a chair, lean back too far, and fall over backwards.  Laugh hysterically for about ten minutes.  Then, one day, repeat the falling-over exercise, but instead of laughing, get up, look…

  • 250 Ways to Annoy Your Roommate

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Smoke jimson weed.  Do whatever comes naturally. Switch the sheets on your beds while s/he is at class. Twitch a lot. Talk while pretending to be asleep. Steal a fishtank.  Fill it with beer and dump sardines in it.  Talk to them. Become a subgenius. Inject his/her Twinkies with a mixture of Dexatrim and MSG.…