Dr Wingnut

Category: Humor

  • How to call in sick

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    Dr Wingnut
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    A guy calls his boss and says that he is sick and won’t be in today.The boss says, "What’s wrong?"The guy says, "I have anal glaucoma."The boss says, "What’s that."The guy says, "I can’t see my ass coming to work today.via email from Eric Diedrich, Thu 02/19/04 17:07 -0500

  • Things to say when you get stressed

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    A hard-on doesn’t count as personal growth.Ambivalent?  Well, yes and no.Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego?Back off!  You’re standing in my aura.Chaos, panic and disorder…my work here is done.Do I look like a people person?Do they ever shut up on your planet?Don’t bother me, I’m living happily ever after.Don’t worry.  I…

  • In case you can’t wait for B-ball season

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    Smack the Penguin to work on your batting practice.  Also good when Linux pisses you off; which doesn’t happen very often; but it’s better to be prepared than not.link via email from John Treworgy, Wed, 18 Feb 2004 08:41:47 -0500

  • Singing in Church

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    A minister decided to do something a little different one Sunday morning.He said "Today, in church, I am going to say a single word and you are going to help me preach.  Whatever single word I say, I want you to sing whatever hymn comes to your mind.  The pastor shouted out "Cross."  Immediately the…

  • Recall of New Minnesota Quarters

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    Dr Wingnut
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    The United States Treasury has announced they are recalling the new Minnesota Quarters."We are recalling all of the new Minnesota quarters that were recently issued," Treasury Undersecretary Russell Shackelford said in a press conference Monday.  "This comes in the wake of numerous reports to this agency that the quarters will not work in parking meters,…

  • What Superhero are you?

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    Dr Wingnut
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    I am proud to say that I didn’t cheat and ended up as the superhero that I have always wanted to be.  Take the quiz by clicking on the picture:

  • Getting the most from your IT department

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    Dr Wingnut
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    When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals, dried flowers, bowling trophies and children’s art.  We don’t have a life, and we find it deeply moving to catch a fleeting glimpse of yours.Don’t write anything down.  Ever.  We…