Category: Humor

Adam Sandler's version of Macarana, "The Masturbata" (sung to tune of the Macarana) by Adam SandlerSitting in my house, and I know that I'm alona,Feeling kinda horny, got a jingle in my bona.Go and grab a Penthouse it's the one with Sharon StonaHey Masturbata!!I go a little faster and its feeling kind of nicea,Once ain't…

A guy is walking past a big wooden fence at the insane asylum and he hears all the residents inside chanting, "Thirteen!  Thirteen!  Thirteen!"Quite curious about this, he finds a hole in the fence, and looks in.  Someone inside pokes him in the eye.Then everyone inside the asylum starts chanting, "Fourteen! Fourteen! Fourteen!"

"Viagra. The quicker dicker upper""One-a-day, like iron""Get a piece of the rock""You've come a long way, baby""Viagra, it plumps when you take 'em""Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman"Tastes great, more filling""Viagra, built ram tough""Here's the beef!"Just do her.Some honorable mentions:"We work harder, so you don't have to""Ten inches long… and growing.""Viagra,…

Excerpt from a recent live radio interview on one of the regional Welsh stations.A female newscaster is interviewing the leader of a Youth club:Interviewer: So, Mr. Jones, what are you going to do with these children on this adventure holiday?Jones: We're going to teach them climbing, abseiling, canoeing, archery, shooting…Interviewer: Shooting!  That's a bit irresponsible…

After carefully evaluating the government's suit against them, Microsoft decided to release Windows 98 anyway, after adding these 11th-hour tweaks:Included subliminal "Impeach Janet Reno" messages in start-up screen.New Internet Explorer feature: whenever you visit a Web site ending in ".gov," a message first appears reminding you that Microsoft is not a monopoly.Source code no longer…

I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She…

Sometimes it DOES take a Rocket ScientistScientists at NASA have a gun built specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity.  The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.British engineers…