Category: Humor
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Toilet Paper
A husband, tired of his wife asking him how she looks, buys her a full length mirror. This does little to help, as now she just stands in front of the mirror, looking at herself, asking him how she looks.One day, fresh out of the shower, she is yet again in front of the mirror,…
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Welcome to Atlantic City
A TRUE STORY IN ATLANTIC CITY NJ (WAS IN THE PAPER)On a recent weekend in Atlantic City, a woman won a bucketful of quarters at a slot machine. She took a break from the slots for dinner with her husband in the hotel dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters in her…
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Why Lutherans Love to Sing…
By Garrison KeillorI have made fun of Lutherans for years — who wouldn't if you lived in Minnesota? But I have also sung with Lutherans and that is one of the main joys of life, along with hot baths and fresh sweet corn. We make fun of Lutherans for their blandness, their excessive calm, their…
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A Heaven joke
On their way to a justice of the peace to get married, a couple had a fatal car accident.The couple found themselves sitting outside Heaven's Gate waiting on St. Peter to do an intake. While waiting, they wondered if they could possibly get married in Heaven.St. Peter finally showed up and they asked him. St.…
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And you thought physics was boring…
This was an actual question given on a University of Washington physics midterm:“Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Support your answer with proof.”Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant. One…
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Box Under Bed
A man and a women were married for 40 years. When they first got married the man said "I am putting a box under the bed. You must promise never to look in it".In all their 40 years of marriage the woman never looked. However on the afternoon of their 40th anniversary curiosity got the…
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Country/Western song titles (all are actual titles)
Get Your Biscuits In The Oven And Your Buns In The BedGet Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Good-byeI Can't Get Over You, So Why Don't You Get Under Me?I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go BowlingI Got In At 2 With A 10 And Woke Up At 10 With…