The teachergave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to tell them astory with a moral at the end of it. The next day the kids came back andone by one began to tell their stories.

Kathy said, "My father's afarmer and we have a lot of egg-laying hens. One time we were taking oureggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the pickup when we hit abump in the road and all eggs went flying and broke and made a mess." "Andwhat's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher. "Don't put all youreggs in one basket!" "Very good," said the teacher.

"Now, Lucy?""Our family are farmers too. But we raise chickens for the meat market. Wehad a dozen eggs one time, but when they hatched we only got ten livechicks. And the moral to this story is, don't count your chickens untilthey're hatched." "That was a fine story Lucy.

Johnny do you have astory to share?" "Yes, ma'am, my daddy told me this story about my AuntAnna. Aunt Anna was a flight engineer in Desert Storm and her plane gothit. She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was abottle of whiskey, a machine gun and a machete. She drank the whiskey onthe way down so it wouldn't break and then she landed right in the middleof enemy troops. She killed seventy of them with the machine gun untilshe ran out of bullets, then she killed twenty more with the machete tillthe blade broke and then she killed the last ten with her bare hands.""Good heavens," said the horrified teacher, "What kind of moral did yourdaddy tell you from that horrible story?" Don't f*** with Aunt Anna whenshe's been drinking.

via eMail, 15 May 2000